The loss of a loved one brings great pain, but at the same time teaches us to value life.
“Everything that does not kill us makes us stronger” – this aphorism of Friedrich Nietzsche fully refers to grief. Even though this is one of the most difficult emotional states that a person experiences, it can also bring certain benefits. Here are some important lessons grief over the loss of loved ones can teach us.
1. Realize the value of life
Psychologists and people who have suffered a loss note that it becomes a powerful impetus for realizing life’s value. Of course, such an understanding does not come immediately. But the encounter with death, sooner or later, can lead a person to a similar conclusion.
American psychologist Lara Honos-Webb says that mourners repeatedly recall the ordinary moments they lived with the departed person and realize their significance. Thus, they begin to value more their current life with its most common events. Philosopher and coach Joel Almeida also note that facing death leads to realizing one’s own mortality. It helps to prioritize life and take action without looking back at the opinions of others.
2. Get closer to the living
The loss of an important person’s loss allows you to feel how important the connection with other relatives, loved ones, and friends are.
Petty quarrels and resentments fade into the background, and love and unity come to the fore.
Simultaneously, the connection with loved ones is strengthened both during the joint experience of loss and when they help the person simultaneously experience it.
3. Feel the power of connection with the departed
Paradoxically, but it is grief that allows one to appreciate the relationship with the departed highly. American psychotherapist Shulamit Widawsky argues that grief connects us to the one we have lost. If it were not for it, we would disconnect from the sad event and not feel the power of love we feel after the loss.
4. Learn to cry
It may sound a little cynical, but during a strong experience, you can learn about the life-giving power of tears. This knowledge is especially useful for men, many of whom have been told since childhood that they should not cry.
Tears have definite benefits for the body.
Scientist and one of the most famous experts on crying, William H. Frey conducted several studies in the early 1980s, the results of which were published in the book “Crying: The Secret of Tears.”
Dr. Frey concluded that emotional tears (unlike ordinary tears designed to moisturize the eyeball) detoxify stress hormones and toxins from the body. Also, crying can stimulate the release of endorphins. That is, from a scientific point of view, you need to cry.
5. Release emotions
American grief and loss management specialist Jon Terrell argues that working through negative emotions (anger, sadness, resentment) associated with loss helps to live more fulfilling lives.
Our stuck emotions contain tremendous energy. Releasing this energy is the fastest and most effective way to awaken, heal yourself, and achieve your goals.
After all, negative experiences are as much a part of our life and psyche as positive ones. Having accepted them, we are at least a little bit closer to happiness.
Adapted and translated by Wiki Avenue Staff
Sources: Life hacker