Life is not over, and the plan of action drawn up by psychologists will help to verify this. If you are going through a breakup, these tips will help you.
Allow yourself get hurt
Yes exactly. You don’t need to be artificially invigorated. I want to cry – cry. If you want to shout – shout (don’t forget about the neighbors who can hear you). Sing sad songs in the shower. Watch avid serials.
You will be told that everyone is breaking up, and there is no need to make a tragedy out of it. Don’t listen or try to hide the pain. Nobody knows what is in your soul, except you. If it hurts, let it hurt. Cry until the tears run out until you feel better, or at least until you feel empty.
Strength will return to you, but it takes time. Each person has his own time.
Read also: How to Part Ways Peacefully
Don’t blame yourself
The decision to break up does not come overnight, not even in a month. Most often, it is accompanied by a long process of reflection. The reasons can be very different. But this does not mean that you have missed something somewhere. This means that you both started to lose contact a long time ago.
The responsibility always rests with both, though not always equally. It is not worth calculating who is more to blame. Look to the future and don’t repeat your mistakes.
Don’t just blame yourself. Yes, you could be less annoyed or less demanding. But your partner could talk to you about it.
Don’t try to get your partner back
If it seems to you that there is nothing else left in life and you need to return everything, stop. Fear speaks in you. It’s scary to be alone after a long relationship. And this is a completely normal reaction. Don’t give in to fear. Do not try to return the ex with humiliated requests. Even if he returns, nothing good will come of such a relationship.
When the first acute pain passes, go where you could not have time to go together. Watch movies that you liked, but your ex-partner didn’t like. Think about a hobby that was abandoned during your relationship.
Do what you would never do together. This will allow you to feel freedom that was not there before.
In many cities, dance, drawing, clay modeling, knitting, or metal burning studios are now open. A trial lesson is often free. Why not give it a try? In the worst case, you will lose an hour. At best, you will find a work that you love with all your soul.
Many people lose weight immediately after breaking up because they can starve for days. But when the body’s resources are completely depleted, appetite wakes up, and weight begins to grow. You do not want to eat at the same time but to seize a bad mood with high-carbohydrate foods; pizza, ice cream, chocolate. If at the same time you move a little, the weight will grow even faster. Therefore, you need to move, even if only to a minimum.
Make a list of good things
Do you think the world has faded and nothing good is left? This is not true. Your brain reacts to stress, and one day the black streak will end.
Until then, make a list of the good things you have. Work, friends, books, a collection of stamps or favorite cups, the taste of hot coffee in the morning, the smell of freshly cut grass, shopping – everything that brings you joy. Add items to the list regularly, and when things get terrible, reread.
Change your environment
If everything around you reminds you of a former partner, you should think about changing the environment. Can’t leave? Rearrange, buy new curtains or dishes. Changing the color scheme will help you tune in a different way. Experiment.
Adapted and translated by Wiki Avenue Staff
Sources: Life hacker