The society of a loved one can be destructive. The main thing is to recognize it in time and take action. Read along with me to find out more.
1. Friendship turns into a competition
Sharing your accomplishments and celebrating each other’s successes is normal. But traditional Friday get-togethers shouldn’t turn into a vanity fair. If you are preparing a shortlist of your accomplishments for the next meeting, it is possible that something went wrong. In case of failure, the friend should support, not assert himself at your expense. Otherwise, it negatively affects your self-esteem and attitude, but is this what you want?
2. A friend is jealous of you
The position “Either I or he” looks more or less adequate in the middle group of kindergarten. When the school years are long gone, such as ultimatums, jealousy, and attempts to control, look at least strange. You have the right to enter into a loving and friendly relationship on the side, and if a friend does not understand this, it is safer to stop communicating.
3. All your hangouts end with a hangover
Perhaps you have a friend with whom you can have fun, arrange a raid on bars, have a drink. But if alcoholic libations accompany each of your meetings, and in the morning you feel bad about what you had drunk the day before and are ashamed to remember, then this is a wake-up call.
Friends should have common interests, but alcohol may not be the only catalyst for a relationship. Here we are talking about other dependencies. Also, communication should charge you with cheerfulness and not put you to bed for a day with a headache and a wet towel on your forehead.
4. You are forced to play silent
Friendship and loving relationships are good and productive when they are a full partnership. At the same time, you give and receive approximately equal shares, not only about material things. If in all conversations the interlocutor almost always talks about what is interesting to him, and you nod and do not have time to insert a word, this is normal only in one case; there is a “psychologist” sign on your door, and the interlocutor is not your friend, but a client.
5. You only share bad news
Friendship, like marriage, is designed to keep you together in grief and joy. When you start pouring only negativity on each other, saving good news for someone else, that relationship might not work very well. You may be afraid to share happy moments because criticism, devaluation, the competition will follow. And this is a very transparent hint that it’s time to put an end to a friendship.
6. Your friend gossips a lot
There is a deep chasm between discussing mutual acquaintances and judging them. If a friend likes to wash the bones of someone, tell about unpleasant secrets, find non-existent flaws, you should think about whether you can trust him. There is a great risk that your secrets are spreading around the city and in a distorted form.
7. Anticipation of a meeting is scary, not happy
You no longer include gatherings with a friend in your plans, and the thought of a chance meeting is more frightening than happy. And this is not just an alarm bell, but a signal siren that notifies the need to evacuate this friendship. The fact that nothing else binds you is also hinted at by the unwillingness to spend time together. You must invite someone third or fourth to a party to act as a buffer between you and fill in the awkward pauses in the conversation.
8. A friend asks you to do things that hurt you
Folklore consists of thousands of proverbs and songs about true friendship and especially help, by which the truth of a relationship is determined. It’s okay to help out a friend in a difficult moment, but some markers will help determine that a person is turning from a friend into a parasite who is only interested in your services.
For example, if a person asks you to get up early to help them light their car battery, that’s fine. If he demands the same when you have an important meeting at work and then is offended that you did not help, you should think about it.
9. A friend always pushes his position
You probably have not only common interests but also different ones. For example, you like Mexican food, friends Japanese. But instead of alternating restaurants, you over with longing, eat sushi and rolls, and your friend at the same time flatly refuses to even look at guacamole. You listen only to jazz during the gatherings, although you yourself love rock. Still, you would love to watch “Scary Movie.” The one-sided game should be stopped; friendship works on the principles of reciprocity.
10. You are afraid of being vulnerable around a friend
You have been communicating for a long time, you know a lot about each other, you have found yourself in funny and embarrassing situations together. Still, now you are uncomfortable sharing with a friend. Especially when it comes to important things. Perhaps he once did not support you, was sarcastic or rude. In any case, even if a friend behaved impeccably, but you do not want to share intimacy with him, this is a hint that your paths are beginning to diverge.
11. After meeting with a friend, you do not feel inspired but devastated
Anything can happen in relationships, but in general, they should rather motivate and support you. If the friendship has turned into an overcoming and you only hold on to it because of nostalgic feelings, it’s time to tie it up.
Adapted and translated by Wiki Avenue Staff
Sources: Life hacker